Who Stole the Zmulobeast? Chapter 3, Scene 3


Stool Pigeon took a deep breath, then got down off his stool and started pacing back and forth across the floor.

“Okay, look, this is the way it was, man. I know some folks who see things, right? So every once in a while those folks, they decide to tell me what it is they see. I don’t tell where I get the information, they keep the information coming my way. Pretty simple deal, and it works.”

To be a kid, Stool Pigeon had to be the oldest-sounding little guy I’d ever seen. Usually when you run across someone who’s seen a lot, you say they’ve been around the block a few times. I think Stool Pigeon’s been running laps around the whole neighborhood.

“So anyway, I’m just hangin’ out makin’ my normal rounds and stuff, when one of my people comes up to me and starts tuggin’ on the shirt. Man, I just got this shirt, all right? Cost a lot of money. I’m sayin’ I don’t like folks pullin’ and tuggin’ on my new stuff ‘cause I don’t get new stuff that often. I didn’t grow up on the good side of town, okay?”

“So when this kid comes up yankin’ on my shirt, I start to go off on him. I don’t mean hit him or nothin’, like that. I mean, he’s a good kid and all, but I gotta let him know he doesn’t want to be doing that kind of thing again. But then I see the look on his face, and right then I can tell he’s got somethin’ good. So I ease his paws off my shirt, then I tell him to take it easy. He starts shakin’ his head, ‘cause he wants to tell me right then, right? I say naw, you gotta calm down, so then he says…”

“Uhhh, Stool Pigeon? Not much time? Remember?”

That was Chief.

“Cool. Sorry about that. You know sometimes I get carried away. Anyway, what the kid tells me is that he’s hangin’ out down by the loading docks, just enjoyin’ the day and checkin’ out all the wildlife down there when…”

“Wildlife?” Chief asked.

“Yo,” said Zuke. “It means folks, Chief.”

“Wildlife? Means folks?”


Chief shook her head like she was starting to get a headache, then she tells Stool Pigeon to keep going. Which he does.

“Yeah, folks. Right. So anyway, The Little One’s down there checkin’ the wildlife when he hears something going on down the way. Whole bunch of scufflin’. Then he hears somethin’ he thinks sounds like ‘OOOOlo! OOOOlo!’. Then right after that, there’s this big WHUMP sound, like somethin’ getting’ smacked really hard. No more ‘OOlo’ sounds no more. All right? You folks with me? Cool. So then it looks like there’s some other folks who hear the noise too, ‘cause they all stsrt lookin’ over toward where the noise was comin’ from. Some even started heading that way, toward this van that was parked near a big fishing boat toward the end. A really big van.”

“So what’s this fishing boat got to do with all this?” I asked.

He shrugged.

“Dunno. Maybe nothin’. Maybe somethin’. Just know that’s where the van was that these guys put the thing into. The thing The Litte One saw, that is. Like Chief said, there was a fan-shaped tail hanging out the end of this stretcher-like thing, and there was a claw dangling over the side. That’s all he saw, except for when the van took off away from the boat and hit the road. Thing is, he probabaly wasn’t supposed to be able to see that much. The Little One, he called the police anyway. He loves detective work and he’s always reportin’ suspicious stuff to the cops.”

“But did he hear anything about where they might have been going with it?” asked Maria. “I mean, I know he was not very close probably, but if he heard anything then maybe…”

“Aw man, you know what? I think he did say he might have heard a little something, but because of how far away he was, you know, it’s like he can’t be for sure if he really herd it, or if he heard it right.”

“Tell us anyway,” said Chief. “We may still be able to work with it.”

“Yeah, sure, if you think it’ll help. The Little One said he thinks what he heard one of ‘em say wa something about a helix, or something like that.”

“A helix? Yo, what in the world is a helix, dude?” asked Zuke.

“Hey, Chief asked what The Little One thought he heard, and I’m just passin’ that along. Information requested, information delivered. Can’t do more than that.”

“But Helix? How is that supposed to help? Like, is that a place or what?”

“We may all just have to give it some time until it becomes more clear,” said Chief. “In the meantime, I’ll call the police department myself and put out and APB for a missing van. My guess is there’s a good chance it’s probably stolen. If I’m wrong, then at least it’ll slow those things down a little.

“Sooner or later the pieces start falling together. You all know that. Look how many of them have already started arranging themselves. Patience is what we need. And time. Who knows, maybe Ursula will turn up something that ties the knot. We’ll just have to see. Patience…”

“Yeah, um, Chief, I gotta cruise. Got people I need to meet out there.”

And in a flash, Stool Pigeon had vanished.

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About the author
Writer and musician.



2016-05-17 13:47:21 Reply

Wow I must confess you make some very trchanent points.

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