The smell of mayonnaise murders in the air

mayonnaise murders

Busy editing my next book, “The Mayonnaise Murders Part 2.” Lotta work, but must say I’m pretty excited. With each new book I feel like I’m getting better, plus working with Scrivener has made all the difference in the world. That is the one app absolutely no writer should be without.

Anyway, here’s a taste of what’s to come. Right now I’m shooting for a July release. Stay tuned for more excerpts to come…

Deep Cluck chuckled to himself as Haley’s incredulous question echoed within the furiously busy confines of his mind.

“Are you guys fuckin nuts?”

As a human, and more importantly as someone who was not a mutant chicken or a critter (although he indeed was a particularly strange-looking individual), Deep Cluck was able to facilitate travel between Planet 10 and Earth much easier when he was accompanied only by other humans than when having to deal with all the various security paperwork complications and headaches that inevitably arose whenever trying to arrange interplanetary transport involving non-humans. It wasn’t so much that critters were considered any kind of real threat so much as it was all pretty much a red tape charade designed to make interplanetary travel as uncomfortable and inconvenient for critters as possible so that they would preferably stay ‘where they belonged’ on their own planet.

As for the chickens, they were still thought to have been extinguished during the Great Poultry Uprising years ago, so any sighting of a mutant chicken would cause a considerable amount of panic and consternation. Not to mention the inevitably outraged reaction to the very idea of transporting a mutant chicken on a plane with normal human beings.

Which was why, on this particular return trip, Cluck had decided to take Beardy along with him, not Butch, even though the purpose of the trip was to reconnect with the remaining chicken crew left behind at the shack in the Dreg Region. It had been six months since he and Beardy had departed on their original trip, accompanied by Vid and Vee, and Cluck knew they would want to be updated on what was going on and what progress was being made. No doubt they had already seen the story in the Daily Screamer so they would have a ton of questions about that too. But most importantly, they all needed to be on the same page about what was coming next. And when.
“Yo, I’d say everything looks pretty much the same,” said Beardy, as he stepped off the transport into the station, surveying the noisily familiar surroundings of V-5. “Smells pretty much the same too. Can’t say as I missed that too much.”

Deep Cluck closed his eyes, stretched out his long, spindly arms, and took in a deep breath of the air that smelled somewhat metallic mixed with a hint of oranges. Held it in. Then released slowly. Smiled.

“That, Mr. Beardy, is the smell of the future.”

The Mayonnaise Murders. Round Two. Now things really start to get crazy…

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